You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize