is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
