Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
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