I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
so explain again why im purple
no
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Randomize
