it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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