Will you blow on my dice?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
