Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
