so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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