i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I think people are normalizing furries
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize