You're completely useless in the revolution.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
