I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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