Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
