I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
