I'm going to rape someone's good day.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
