the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
