Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
i dont even know how to be here
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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