I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
