do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
