I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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