who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
