Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Randomize
