there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
