I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
