yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
