And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Randomize
