3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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