Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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