Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
