i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
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