I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
The dick lei will go down in squad history
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
