Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
