He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize