i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
