I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I have tasted many bathrooms
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
