I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I just gift wrapped bread.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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