So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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