..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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