Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize