Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
