i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
