I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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