He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
