Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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