Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Your cock deserves a montage
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
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