I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
