I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Randomize
