We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
