Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Randomize