$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
