I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Randomize
